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Dr. Kelly Brennan - Yes, we ARE toddlers!

Oct 02, 2013 -- 5:35pm

A Real Man Responds: “Yes, We ARE Like Toddlers,” Five Lessons Women Can Learn About Men Through The Way They Raise Toddlers.By David Wygant


Last week,one of my colleagues wrote an article explaining that there’s a lot women can actually learn about men by observing toddlers.

That got me thinking: Are men really just giant babies?  Should we be walking around wearing diapers instead of Levi’s?  Should we be breast fed multiple times a day? The other day in my blogwe debated about how mature men really are.

Well, maybe not the diapers, but a lot of men have breast envy, so they certainly would love to be soothed by the boob.  Let’s talk about five lessons women can learn about men through the way they raise toddlers.

Five lessons women can learn about men through the way they raise toddlers:

1. “I’m frustrated!”

When we get frustrated, whether it’s while driving, trying to fix the internet connection, not having our turn with the remote control, at some point we’ll want to use brute force to try to get things our way.  When that happens, what we really want is be soothed, just like a little toddler.  So the next time your man is having a toddler attack, walk over to him with a little love.  Rub the back of his neck and head and tell him to calm down, everything’s going to be OK.  Studies have shown that enough men will magically calm down with a woman’s touch.



2.  “I want it, now!”

When men want something, they want it, and they want it now.  Just like a toddler.  Put a man in a hardware store, a sporting goods store, or a car dealership.  All of a sudden, he sees the shiny tool kit or the brand new Mercedes and thinks to himself, I want that.  Even if he can’t afford it, it’ll stay on his mind.  Men are toy-obsessed.  So just like a little toddler, you have to take him by the hand and tell them in order to get that car, that tool, that new sports gear, he needs to be a good boy and work a little harder so he can get it on his special day, maybe his birthday.  Your man needs you to pull him away just like a little toddler so he doesn’t make a mistake and buy something he can’t afford.

3.  “Getting him dressed”

Just like a toddler, a man sometimes needs a little help getting dressed.  When your guy leaves the house for work and he hasn’t tucked the back of his shirt in, or he thinks he looks presentable going out to dinner in his old college sweatshirt and a ball cap, sometimes you need to lead him by the hand, lay out the clothes he needs to wear, and help him put them on just like a toddler.  If a toddler dressed himself, he’d walk around with his shirt hanging over his head, a diaper half on, and his shoes flopping all over the place.

4.  “I want my drinks!”

Just like a toddler needs milk, men need their drinks.  Whether it’s beer, water, or Gatorade, when a man is craving a drink and doesn’t have it, he starts getting grumpy and irritable.  The next time your man needs a drink and he’s getting irritated and short-tempered, put his favorite drink in a glass, hand it to him, and watch his eyes light up and his temperament calm down.

5.  “Learning to clean up”

Leave a man alone in the house for a weekend, and 48 hours later you come home and it looks like a bomb went off.  Leave a toddler alone in the room, and 30 minutes later it looks like a bomb went off.  A man needs constant attention like a toddler.  A man needs discipline.  He needs to be told exactly how the house is supposed to look when you get back. 

Before you leave for business or go away with the girls, lay down the ground rules and tell him, “Please leave the house in the same condition that you found it.  Don’t leave beer, poker chips, or potato chips all over the coffee table.  If you’re going to have your other toddler men over for a visit, make sure all of you pitch in at the end of the night to clean up.”  

You have to teach your toddler man how to clean the room, because it is all about repetition.  Practice by having him help you clean the room first, turn it into a song, make it fun, and give him a reward after the chores are done.

These are five lessons that you can learn from toddlers in order to keep your relationship running smoothly, to make your man feel loved and nurtured, and to have him feel good about doing the little things like cleaning up after himself.  Because just like a toddler, a man loves praise from his woman.  After he cleans up, looks at you proudly and says, “I cleaned the kitchen,” don’t tell him what he missed.  Tell him what a great job he did first.  Say, “You are so good at cleaning the kitchen, it is amazing.  Next time, honey, make me even more proud of you by making sure that you get all the knives and forks into the dishwasher too.”  Just like a toddler.  Lots of praise, soothing voices, and you’ll find yourself with an amazing domesticated man.

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship coach, author and speaker. He offers his advice as a lead writer for Yahoo! Personals and across television segments, newspapers and magazines, including MTV, The New York Times, MSNBC, Fox News, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health and E! Entertainment Television -- as well as on over 2,000 radio shows.

Researched and edited by Dr. Kelly Brennan for the Terry Boyd’s World Radio Show on AM 860 KPAM, Wednesday, October 02, 2013. Portland. Oregon.

Return to: Terry Boyd Blog

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